How “Fightin' Army #76” begins
Every balloon from the first pages, as it is read aloud:
Fightin' army
Which is worse… A firing squad… Or a burning hot desert? Where do i go?
Introducing the first chapter of the continuing saga of… "the lonely war of capt. Willy shultz!"
The trouble with the 2nd battalion
In world war ii, i had command of a rifle company… And i took them from normandy beach right into berlin! But as i take over command of the 2nd btn., 17th infantry, 2nd division i try to make allowances… But just looking at these draftees i know they'll never do the job against the tough chinese hordes flooding down from the yalu river!
You men don't look like soldiers! I can't lead rabble like you into battle.
If you wish to address me, captain salters, you will wait until i am through and then ask permission to speak.
Sir, these men have been in line for seventeen…
I'm going to tell division that the 2nd battalion is not combat ready! It may be necessary to break up this group and use all of you for non-combatant replacements!
Dismissed!
Captain salters, remain where you are!
Captain, i was sent up from seoul to take command of this battalion. How could you officers and n.c.o.'s permit this deterioration?
Colonel, there's nothing wrong with the 2nd battalion.
We've been living in slit-trenches and korean mudholes for seventeen days. If you spent even one night in a slit-trench you wouldn't look so hot either!
Captain, you are being disrespectful! Now, go and try to do something with baker company.
The jeep driver assigned to me is an old soldier… Court-martialed from master-sergeant and now a corporal. He knows how bad the outfit is…
As the driver heads back toward the battalion c.p., i unload some of the bitterness…
Is that joker tryin' tuh salute us or what?
Never mind, corporal. Just keep driving… These clowns are liable to do anything!
Don't go over the ridge!